A local LGBT leader and a former candidate for the North Carolina Senate...
Can an ex cheat on you if you’re not dating
Updated: August 29, 2013 at 4:05 pm
I was with this girl for a month until I found out she was telling other people she was single. Now, I found out that she’s in a threeway with two other women. Isn’t that cheating? And, do we have a chance of getting back together? I still love her!
Love’s Triangle, Minneapolis, MN
Well Love’s Triangle,
First, you can’t get VD from a doorknob and you can’t be cheated on by someone you’re not dating. Second, yes, you can get back together, but why? She’s obviously exploring her sexual freedom and doesn’t seem the least bit interested you. Sorry, but it had to be said! If you have that much love for her, why not give it to someone who wants it. Baby, it’s time to love yourself as much as you love her and release her to the triangle of love!
I can never seem to get ahead. Even when I make a good pay check for the week it never lasts. I know you give dating advice, but I need a little financial advice.
Money Woes, Des Moines, IA
Hey Money Woes,
There’s three ways to make money, “make it, invest (some of) it or save it.” Think savings bank, IRA or “under the mattress!” (My cartoon can give you tips on how I handle this challenging question.)
Everytime I go out hoping to meet potential dates, I end up wasting time with guys who inevitably only want sex. Am I the only gay man on earth who goes to bars hoping to meet future dates, not just one-night stands? What am I doing wrong?
Not Only Sex, Boston, MA
Hello Not Only Sex,
If you’re truly going to bars looking for future dates, then don’t waste time flirting with guys who, a) are from out of town, b) are overtly sexual and/or c) you think just want a quickie. Otherwise, you’ll never meet Mr. Right just Mr. One Night, which isn’t bad, but it won’t get you a second date. Pumpkin, you have to be strategic with your time at the bars, not just seduced by sexy guys. Stay aware!
I know I shouldn’t ask, but isn’t there something I can do to punish someone I was dating for standing me up on our last and final date. Isn’t some revenge appropriate?
Revenge, Albuquerque, NM
No! Living your own life to the fullest is the best revenge. But, if you still don’t believe me, sweetie, then try reading:
Trinity’s Empowering Tips For What You Can And Can’t Do To Someone Who Stands You Up
1. You can’t scratch his car, break his windows or kill his cat because you must trust that he or she will be taught a lesson of greater punishment.
2. You can’t continuously call her home and then hang up just to bother her because you’re not 12 anymore. You grew up, remember!
3. You can’t go to his work and harass him because it was just a date.
4. You can’t call the police and have her arrested on bogus charges such as kidnapping, burglary or attempted murder, although it would be fun!
5. And, lastly, you can’t have him beaten up, scared or maimed because you don’t want to waste that much energy on any date!
6. But, you can go on with your life and be more choosy of who you date.
7. You can ignore her when you see her knowing that she missed out on someone really great.
8. You can let other people know that he has no integrity!
9. You can discard her phone number, rip up her letters and toss out her toothbrush!
10. And, lastly, you can imagine something really, really awful happening to him just for a few minutes. What the hell, he deserves it!
info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.
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