My lover is very controlling and would “kill me” if I suggested breaking up. I’m planning on running away when he’s gone on a business trip. Could this work?
Away I Go, Los Angeles, Calif.
Hello Away I Go,
Running away is not the best solution. It is often emotionally childish and mentally devastating to both of you. Being honest is always best, however, if you’re in danger by telling him then “run” and talk later when you’re safe. Don’t leave this column behind, but do leave a letter. Run smartly and strategically. Plan, plan, plan. Some cash wouldn’t hurt either. Do it right the first time, not like a chicken whose lover is trying to cut its head off!
I’m going to propose to someone. Any ideas?
Propose Stumped, Santa Fe, N.M.
Hey Propose Stumped,
With any proposal always prepare yourself mentally for the worst and pray for the best. Expectation ruins everything. Now, you can be romantic and simple or you can be exciting and outrageous. It’s all up to what you think would bring the best response. Oh, and try not to kill yourself in the process.(My cartoon shows you how I would do it.)
I’ve been invited to a family wedding and I’m thinking of bringing someone I am dating. I don’t want my date to get scared thinking I am suggesting anything longterm by introducing him to my family. It’s only been a month. Also, I’m recently out of the closet and don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable. Help!
Wedding Date, Maui, Hawaii
Dear Wedding Date,
First, talk to the couple getting married to see if they care if your gay date comes. If they do, then never talk to them again, I mean, do what feels right in your heart. At big events most people get drunk, don’t care who is gay and/or think that gay couples are physically challenged heterosexuals with extremely good-looking assistants. And, lastly, yes, ask your date to go with you, but in a light, easygoing way. Of course, never suggesting that he or she is really the one you want your family to meet as well as seeing if this style of wedding would work for the both of you.
I just lost my job. I thought I was doing great but blah, blah, blah. I’ve been very depressed and need some words of wisdom.
Down Deep, Philadelphia, Pa.
Hello Down Deep,
Successful people have one thing in common; they don’t give up, give in or get too discouraged for long. They also, constantly, try new ways of bettering themselves knowing that failure is certainly part of success. Now, don’t just listen to me, read:
Trinity’s Smart Quotes For Successful Living
1. You will find the key to success under the alarm clock.
— Benjamin Franklin
2. The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength or knowledge but a lack of will.
3. Success is not measured by what is accomplished, but by the courage to maintain the struggle against overwhelming odds.
— Charles Lindbergh
4. I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
— Bill Cosby
5. Eighty percent of success is showing up.
— Woody Allen
6. Flaming enthusiasm, backed by horse sense and persistence is the quality that most frequently makes for success.
— Dale Carnegie
7. Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.
— Sir Winston Churchill
8. I don’t measure a man’s success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom.
— General George S. Patton
9. Success is often the result of taking a misstep in the right direction.
— Al Bernstein
10. If you want to be successful shut up and keep pushing forward. Don’t waste time complaining!
— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama, and now performs globally.