Hopes for the New Year

General Gayety

by Leslie Robinson  Contributing Writer  lesarobinson@gmail.com
Published: January 8, 2011 in General Gayety

As 2010 drew to a close, I’m was looking ahead. Here are some of my hopes for the LGBT community in 2011, along with a few predictions.

I hope next year the Pope will reveal a new attitude toward gays. I predict he won’t.

Now for a bolder prediction concerning Rowan Williams, the Archbishop of Canterbury, who has the grinding task of holding together the worldwide Anglican Communion as it convulses over the gay issue — I think poor Rowan will chuck it all. He’ll become a pagan and, periodically, be seen frolicking at Stonehenge wearing nothing but a whimsical smile and un-strategically placed flowers.

Turning to another part of the planet, it is my fond hope that the murderous anti-gay bill still pending in Uganda’s parliament will be quietly withdrawn. Or, loudly withdrawn — I’m not particular.

Now that the frothing homophobe Yuri Luzhkov has lost his job as mayor of Moscow, let’s hope that city can finally have an open, legal Pride. Russian LGBT folks need an infusion of freedom. Luzhkov, married to a billionaire, needs a soul, but he’ll probably settle for a Piaget watch.

Turning to these shores, I don’t want 2011 to bring on a case of As Maine goes, so goes New Hampshire. You know that in 2009 Maine voters shot down the state’s same-sex marriage law. Now conservative legislators in New Hampshire are gearing up to repeal gay marriage in the Granite State.

Repeal would be a dagger in the heart of every LGBT person in the state. Plus it could mess with my plans. My partner and I have been considering getting hitched in New Hampshire, my home state. If the legislators kill same-sex marriage, the state will miss out on all the money we planned to spend — on a six-pack and a bag of cheese popcorn.

Regarding the Prop 8 litigation, experts tell us that whatever the outcome in the appellate court, the case won’t really be decided until it reaches the U. S. Supreme Court. I’ll, nonetheless, hope for an appellate court victory. I’m not against being bathed in validation.

With DADT on its official way out of Dodge, what can we expect in 2011 from Sen. John McCain, the Obstructer-in-Chief? After fighting with such baffling intensity to keep DADT, McCain’s passion, or bile, over the issue of gays in the military will continue. Look for him to chain himself to the Pentagon or to Defense Secretary Robert Gates, causing interesting rumors about the two of them.

By the way, if Adm. Mike Mullen, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, is still peeved with Gen. James Amos, head of the Marines Corps, for his public opposition to DADT repeal, I can guess whom Mullen will choose to replace him: Lady Gaga.

If she can wear raw meat from head to toe, she has the stomach for it.

Turning to other performers, country singer Chely Wright and Christian music artist Jennifer Knapp came out in 2010. Since both hail from genres traditionally unfriendly to gays, I want this fine trend to continue this year. Hey 2011, bring us a reggae artist.

Each year I hope a male pro athlete who’s still playing will come out, but so far nobody has obliged me. I hope 2011 will be the year a football, baseball or basketball player does the deed. But, I’ll happily settle for a hockey player. With or without teeth.

Finally, I hope that next spring I don’t have to write another column about a gay teen’s fight to attend his or her prom with the appropriate date. If Constance McMillen could triumph in 2010 in small-town Mississippi, no place is safe from prom equality. : :

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