Calling all work-out and gym enthusiasts: We are looking for folks who regularly work out or have memberships at local gyms. qnotes will be profiling several in our first print edition of the new year and we want to provide anonymous reviews and grades for Charlotte’s gay-friendliest, hippest gyms.

If you want to volunteer, shoot us an email to editor@goqnotes.com with the Subject: “Rate My Gym.” Please respond with your interest to participate no later than 4 p.m. this Wednesday, Dec. 19. All gym grades and reviews will be due by Thursday, Dec. 27.

North Carolina Democratic U.S Sen. Kay Hagan hosted members of the University of North Carolina-Asheville’s UNCA Singers at her Washington, D.C., office today. The group is in D.C. for a variety of performances, including their sixth-annual appearance at the White House.

Photo courtesy Hagan below, via Facebook and Instagram: “#UNCA Singers just performed their rendition of “Deck the Hall” in my office and sounded fantastic! I’m grateful that they’ll be singing for our wounded warriors tomorrow at Walter Reed. http://instagr.am/p/TMJN53iQja/”

Owen Stuart, courtesy owenstuartmusic.com

Really, what more could one ask for?

Got to give him credit for standing by his man, even if his man’s team hasn’t been doing all that well in recent seasons.

The singer is 17-year-old Charlottean Owen Stuart, a senior at Northwest School of the Arts who auditioned this year for “X Factor.” He was later teamed up with other solo auditioners who formed the “X Factor” boyband, Playback.

Stuart’s video for his song, “Cam Newton,” is below, along with some videos from the boyband.

Steven Petrow

“Mr. Manners” Steven Petrow, a Chapel Hill resident and The New York Times‘ “Civil Behavior” columnist, this week addressed a question from a fellow North Carolinian frustrated by the inability for he and his partner to marry. In addition, the North Carolina man has been invited to his niece’s wedding.

“My partner and I live in North Carolina, a state whose constitution now prohibits same-sex marriage,” the North Carolina man writes to Petrow. “We have been together for 25 years and have been to lots of weddings in that time. I used not to mind so much going to other people’s weddings even though we couldn’t make our own union legal. But now I do. I’ve had enough. I’m tired of being polite. In fact, I would like to announce to all friends and family that I will not be attending anyone’s wedding until I attend my own. Do I have your permission to skip my niece’s wedding?”

Petrow’s response, delicately balanced, might surprise you.

“All that being said, you need to choose the high road and go to your niece’s wedding,” Petrow responds. “I’ve always believed that family trumps politics, especially in matters like this. Assuming your niece didn’t actively campaign in favor of Amendment One, don’t make her pay the price for it. I’m guessing you’ve celebrated a lifetime of milestones with this young lady, all as an expression of your love and support for her. How will she feel about your absence on this important day? And how will you feel in 5, 10, or 15 years about having boycotted it?”

Petrow adds, “[T]his doesn’t mean you need be a rollover kitty,” and goes on to suggest several ways the North Carolina man can express his feelings to his niece: writing a letter to her, donating to groups like Freedom to Marry in her and her soon-to-be husband’s name and asking his niece to make a public statement in support of her uncle and his right to marry.

You can read Petrow’s full column at The New York Times…

The Associated Press is discouraging the use of the word “homophobia” by its staffers and writers.

From writer Rev. Irene Monroe at Bilerico.com:

AP Deputy Standards Editor Dave Minthorn shared with Politico his opinion that the word “homophobia” is “just off the mark.” He explained, “It’s ascribing a mental disability to someone, and suggests a knowledge that we don’t have. It seems inaccurate. Instead, we would use something more neutral: anti-gay, or some such, if we had reason to believe that was the case.” It is my opinion that keeping the word “homophobia” narrowly used and confined within a medical context is controlling. It’s also absurd for the AP to think that it could discourage the use of the word with absolutely no consultation with the LGBTQ community; this demonstrates hubris and insensitivity, and it raises questions about the political and social motives behind this decision.

Monroe goes on to delve into the history of the word and her thoughts on why it is most appropriate.

Personally, I’ve always preferred the use of “heterosexism” over “homophobia.” Persons called homophobic aren’t necessarily “afraid” of LGBT people, they simply believe, as white supremacists do about non-white people and some men do about women, that heterosexuality is superior and other sexualities are inferier. Heterosexism and, perhaps, “hetero-supremacy” (though I’ve never personally used this variant) seem more appropriate.

What do you think?

Sunday was Veterans Day and many folks commemorated it with a day off yesterday. Over the weekend, Freedom To Marry was marking the somber occasion with a salute to gay and straight troops — and a call to push for the equality and justice they’ve sacrificed for.

In the video released over the weekend, Freedom To Marry shows two soldiers, one gay and one straight (they don’t identify which is which), undressing to show the scars they obtained in battle.

“Gay and straight service members scar in the same way,” the ending titles read. “But, the military is forced to treat them differently because of the so-called Defense of Marriage Act. Find out more at http://freedomtomarry.org/military.”

The UPS has announced it will no longer fund the Boy Scouts of America due to the youth group’s anti-LGBT discrimination.

According to BuzzFeed, the UPS Foundation updated its website on Monday with this announcement: “The UPS Foundation seeks to support organizations that are in alignment with our focus areas, guidelines, and non-discrimination policy. UPS and The UPS Foundation do not discriminate against any person or organization with regard to categories protected by applicable law, as well as other categories protected by UPS and The UPS Foundation in our own policies. These include, but are not limited to race, gender, national origin, disability, sexual orientation, gender identity, veteran or military status, pregnancy, age and religion.”

UPS gave the Boy Scouts $167,000 in 2010. UPS joins Intel in dropping scout funding.

The Boy Scouts of America has long discriminated against openly gay youth and leaders. Gay men and young adults were also regularly tracked in the group’s so-called “perversion files” and listed there alongside accused and admitted child molesters.