Get a front seat for the fireworks when retrograde Mars redirects and trines retrograde Pluto. Oy, vey! How much trouble can you possibly get into? Where will your out-of-control imagination lead you? Let’s try to imagine all the possibilities!

ARIES (03.21-04.20) The urge is to tackle everything and everything with verve and dispatch. Proud Rams think that they are especially efficient, but it is a mirage. Everything that you think you have completed will come back to bite you later because of loose ends, cursory reviews and too little follow-up. Tell the powers-that-be that you are on a conference call.

TAURUS (04.21-05.21) Who will be responsible for letting queer Bulls loose on the party scene? You will not know when enough is enough when fun is taken to the outer limits. Mayhem ensues and you can become grist for the gossip mill. A gurgling romance dares you to take the plunge. So, get out and see whom you can impress. Just don’t stay at home and impress the sofa.

GEMINI (05.22-06.21) Electricity around the house may cause surprising problems now. Check for overloaded outlets and frayed wires. But, all of this domestic investigation shouldn’t dampen your exuberance for over-the-top home entertaining. In fact, right now you can be exceedingly entertaining, pink Twin. Ha cha cha! But, save that lampshade hat routine for the dim bulbs.

CANCER (06.22-07.23) Connection is the pivotal word. What is it about gay Crabs now that require a big discussion on every little thing. Too much talk results in unanticipated reactions. Can you hold it in for a few days and refine your message? There is no dissuading you. Since you can’t move a big boat on wind alone, might as well turn up the motor mouth and hold on tight.

LEO (07.24-08.23) Proud Lions feel pretty darn rosy about their financial prospects. I am not sure why. You gleefully count your winnings, but manage to ignore your mounting losses. Tsk, tsk. Be practical, weigh the risks, do your homework and carefully plot and plan for a sturdy future. Then you will feel ready to run with the bulls…or is it the bears? Hey, whatever turns you on.

VIRGO (08.24-09.23) You are never one to fade into the background, but now, not only do you outshine all competitors, you practically cast a floodlight. Leave it to the planets to make a staid queer Virgin a true iconoclast. Revel in your uniqueness while you command attention but don’t become a caricature. Self-possessed moderation will have them eating out of your hand. Yuck.

LIBRA (09.24-10.23) There are those who would love to see you trip and fall so they can walk all over you. Don’t tempt them. Gay Libras are apt to act on their loosey-goosy gut feelings. Wait and see how events unfold before you jump to conclusions. On the other hand, you could catch a few lucky breaks as their secrets are exposed and demons revealed. Do a little exposing and revealing yourself.

SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) Park yourself in the middle of any group and you will surely find someone who gets you into wild mischief. Proud Scorps are on a rampage where every action can have an equally dramatic reaction. But, there can be a happy ending. By the end of this short-but-intense period, you will know the difference between conscript and co-conspirator.

SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) Taking a professional risk may be too risky. Queer Archers are chomping at the bit for advancement, recognition and the big bucks that go with a corner office. Hold off for a couple of weeks, buddy. Not only are your eyes too big for your ambitions, but you may rub a powerbroker the wrong way. Heat your oil and pour it on once you have mastered the stove.

CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) Your reach has no boundaries. This is the time to spread your influence and see how charged up you can get the troops. But, filter your message through a good editor before you blast it out to the masses. In the heat of the moment, you may slip out an unintended remark that pops your world view. Are you ready for primetime or fringe, pink Cap?

AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) How short is your fuse? Aqueerians seek a love connection, but their ardor is more spark than slow burn. You may tire easily or lose interest once the bait is taken. Or, you may race off to rescue yet another lost cause. Rather than waste energy and effort, relax, sit back and let the adoring masses come to you. Still waiting…still waiting…

PISCES (02.20-03.20) Whether you are part of a pair or ache to be paired, this is a good time to take a break from any deeply intensive relationship issue. Guppies want results now! And, they are prepared to jump into a quest for a solution with all fours. But, things need time to settle and solidify. Wishing and pushing doesn’t make it so, bubbele. Whining and pleading may however… : :

© 2012 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment.

info: Visit for e-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry. My book “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is available at bookstores and major booksites.