Sex: Never be ashamed of what you don’t know

Tell Trinity

Hello Trinity,
I’m trying to be more open about sex, but I come from a very conservative background! How can I rise above it and learn more about sex?
Sex-Esteem, Savannah, GA

Hello Sex-Esteem,
Anyone can change or be convinced to change their attitudes about sex. Adult magazines, videos and visiting fetish stores, as well as libraries (the bookshelves that is), which have many books, are all places to pick up a few tricks about sex. Sexual attitudes, like life, should be a constantly changing and ever evolving process. Let’s not forget the importance of practicing! Sex is what you make it: boring, uncomfortable, dangerous or fun-tastic! So, honey, never be ashamed of what you know or don’t know. Learn about sex, sexual behaviors and safe sex before you jump into bed with me… I mean, just anyone!

Dear Trinity,
My lover of six years dumped me cold for someone else. I’m falling apart. I used to love life, but now I can’t wait for it to end! I know I should be strong but…!
Dumped Hard, Nashville, TN

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tt_425_021315Dear Dumped Hard,
The minute you’re born, life becomes a struggle to find food, shelter, work, love, relationships and a struggle to understand it all. Within a lifetime, we are all guaranteed obstacles, troubles, traumas and even disasters. In other words, sweetie, “This too shall make you stronger!” So, find reasons to get over your ex, to get over your depression and to get on with life. And if all else fails, become a workaholic, which always helps me forget about those no good, cheating monsters! (My cartoon shows you how I deal with this issue.)

Dearest Trinity,
For a few months now I’ve been having wonderful three-way sex with this couple. Now, they want me to date them exclusively and live as a threesome couple. Seriously, what are your thoughts?
Threesome Thoughts, Ann Arbor, MI

Dearest Threesome Thoughts,
I think you’re crazy… for not going for it! Why not try everything and everyone, well, not everyone! Why not go everywhere and let yourself be carried away by life! Just think how much fun it would be to be carried away by two, not just one. However, as with everything, pumpkin, you must first ask yourself, “Will this experience hurt me or give me a greater insight about life?” And even if your heart gets hurt a bit, you’ll still gain great insight. Life is about learning, so don’t be afraid to try everything twice, even three times! Live dangerously, yet proceed with caution!

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Hello Trinity,
My own mother said I have no morals anymore and won’t talk to me! How can I get her and my morals back?
Moral-less, Peoria, IL

Hello Moral-less,
When your own mother won’t talk to you, darling, it’s time to read:

Trinity’s Snappy Tips For Knowing If You’re MAD (Morals Are Disgusting)
1. Stealing, embezzling, cheating and lying to people who trust you means you’re MAD.
2. Stalking someone who is clearly not interested in you means you’re MAD.
3. Spending your lover’s hard-earned money on lap dancing, strip joints and adult video arcades means you’re MAD.
4. Being unkind or cruel to old people, children, animals, disabled or mentally handicapped people means you’re MAD.
5. Sleeping with the spouse of your best friend means you’re MAD.
6. Sleeping with the best friend of your lover or spouse means you’re MAD.
7. Getting pregnant or someone pregnant just so they’ll marry or stay with you means you’re MAD.
8. Verbally, emotionally or physically abusing others who are in the minority means you are not only taking away someone’s civil liberties, but you’re MAD.
9. Getting someone into legal trouble just to get revenge means you’re MAD.
10. Lastly, ending a relationship without any communication or integrity means you’re a monster and you’re MAD. : :

info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.

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