I’ve always been heterosexual. But lately, while in bed with my girlfriend, I keep fantasizing about her brother. I feel confused. Should I break it off?
Sexually Guilty, Montgomery, AL
Being attracted to someone outside of your sexuality is normal. It doesn’t change your sexuality, it just expands it. You may be bi, gay and/or simply not attracted to your girlfriend. Everyone, in my opinion, is born bisexual and experiences different sexual feelings at different times in one’s life. However, eventually you have to explore and decide what gender does arouse you and what path you need to take to be true to yourself. So, pumpkin, first do some soul searching, and if it is guys that arouse you, please end this current relationship, yet don’t start dating her brother. That is just too “Hollywood Drama” for me!
My husband/partner of four years has disclosed to me that he has been unfaithful. He says, “Fidelity takes time!” Well doesn’t that just want to make you barf! What should I do?
Fidelity Troubles, Palm Springs, CA
Did your man miss the wedding vow, “Thou shall not act like an animal?” You can leave him, work on it or live with his infidelity like most of us do! But no matter what, sweetie, keep an open mind! You know, I’m sure there’s a meeting for this somewhere! (Did we admit we were powerless over “fidelity” at the “meeting”? Check out my cartoon to see how it plays out.)
Why can’t gay men deal with a second date?
Scary Seconds, Philadelphia, PA
Most men between 18 and 65 have the sexual attention span of a 12-year-old and, honey, gay men are no different, which doesn’t leave much room for a second date, never mind a second night away from playing with their favorite toy, themselves! Keep trying.
After dating someone for a while, I still haven’t slept over at his house. I’m so used to sleeping alone, I don’t want to appear neurotic. Help!
Stay Over Stumped, Louisville, KY
I know what you’re talking about. It’s late, he’s snoring, the traffic’s roaring outside, the cat’s scratching your feet and you don’t want to complain. Been there, done that! So, darling, see if these help!
Trinity’s Polite Tips For Avoiding Complications When Sleeping Over A Date’s House
1. If snoring bothers you, then travel with earplugs. Also, have your date sleep on his or her side facing away from you.
2. f you sleep with special feathered pillows and/or a sound effects machine, bring these “specialty” items with you.
3. If you must get up and be on the road by dawn, but you know you both won’t get to sleep till after midnight, shut up about it and enjoy the night or sleep over at another time.
4. If you have dietary needs, bring your favorite foods (for two)! Never assume your date has assorted coffees, juices or a morning milk delivery.
5. If you’re allergic to dogs, cats, gerbils or pythons, let your date know before you end up a sneezy, itchy, runny nosed nightmare!
6. If you’re expecting your date to have contraceptives, then also expect to visit the VD or gynecologist clinic in a few days. Come prepared!
7. If you’re stomach is turning, your head is pounding or your poison ivy is resurfacing, try sleeping over on another night.
8. If you feel the meaningless need to put down, judge or make tacky comments about someone’s living space, stay home!
9. If you’re stuck on certain hair care products, bathing supplies, sleeping on a certain side of the bed or not being tied, I mean touched below the neck, good luck!
10. Lastly, if you assume nothing, ask for what you need, bring what you think will not be available and just this once go with the flow, you may get a sex-sational surprise!
info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.