Hello Trinity,
tt_453_031116Someone I’m dating and really love has tendencies to say the wrong thing at the wrong time. It’s not only embarrassing, it shows a lack of character in both of us. How do I teach boundaries to someone who has no clue?
BoundQueries, Minneapolis, MN

Hello BoundQueries,
Boundaries are something we acquire with time, education, wisdom and common sense. And when it comes to boundaries, I (at least) try these four golden rules: 1) keep unkind words short, 2) keep kind words sincere, 3) keep your mouth shut around strangers and, darling, lastly, 4) only speak well of the dead. Betty Davis once said, “I only speak good of the dead. Joan Crawford is dead. Good!”

Hey Trinity,
Being a religious person, I cannot help but be upset over the pedophilia problems in the church. Do you think there is any way to save faith within the priesthood?
Church Chat, Cleveland, OH

Hey Church Chat,
I don’t have much to say except men are beasts, with a biological drive to toss their seed. Some are strong enough to control their desires, but there is still this “desire” which the priesthood must face. Now, toss in the body’s physical need for affection plus add in an over-sexed Western media to the fornication, I mean formula, and you have the makings of a pedophilia/celibacy dilemma beneath religious robes. Allowing priests to have healthy relationships and/or to celebrate their sexual desires may be the answer. Honey, I guess I did have something to say! (My cartoon addresses this very issue, so take a look at it to gain lofty and well-thoughtout insight.)

Dearest Trinity,
I have no trouble with dating, but I think waiting for someone special is the right way to meet someone. Forced dating seems so fake. Am I alone in this thought?
Date-O-Wait, Seattle, WA

Dearest Date-O-Wait,
It has been said that if you work hard for what you want, you should get what you wish for, eventually, hopefully…well anyway the key word is “work!” When it comes to dating, meeting someone or even life itself, you really are better off working towards your dreams and desires rather than sitting and hoping and you get the idea, sweetie. It’s good to be patient, but try acting like a busy patient!

Dear Trinity,
How do you know when you have a healthy sex life versus when you’re overly promiscuous?
PromisCurious, Nashville, TN

Dear PromisCurious,
That question not only deserves one answer but at least 10:

Trinity’s Sleazy Tips For Knowing If You’re A PIG (Promiscuous Indiscriminate Gorilla)
1. When you have multiple sex partners, multiple times a week and you don’t get paid for it, PIG!
2. So you have syphilis again, no problem. But when you have sex while taking penicillin, PIG!
3. When your glands are swollen from overuse and you have no jewelry to show for it, PIG!
4. Staying out late, cruising for “whatever” and sleeping with whomever does not make you a total PIG unless you’re an insatiable PIG!
5. If you try to keep a lover and can’t, but still need sex and thus sleep around to fulfill your needs, then you’re a practical PIG!
6. PIGs are not bad, wrong or dirty for being PIGs unless, of course, you boast, are unkind or never grow out of being a PIG!
7. You’re not a PIG for having sex 20 different times a year, but when it all occurs in the same month, then you’re, “PIG Of The Month”!
8. So you keep in contact with and genuinely love your many sexual partners, still a PIG!
9. Sex a few times a week is normal, every other day, extremely healthy. But if you’re not trying to stick with the same mate, PIG!
10. Lastly, when you can’t remember who, where, why or how many, then you’re not only a PIG but you have a big PIG problem! : :

info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.