Two’s company, but three…may be a good thing

Tell Trinity

Now really Trinity,

Aren’t threesome relationships a guaranteed scenario for trouble, jealousy and inevitable failure?

Triangular Troubles, Houston, TX

Now really TT,

All relationships between two people, at one time or another, experience trouble, jealousy and possible failure. If you talk to many threesome couples, and I have, honey, the troubles are no different. However, the benefits include always having someone extra around to spend time with, help with the bills and fool around with! Yes, darling, it’s not for everyone, I agree, but it may be worth licking, I mean looking into!

Hello Trinity,

I’m thinking about doing drag. Any ideas?

Drag Thoughts, Memphis, TN

Hello Gorgeous,

There are many types of drag, for example looking cartoonish, looking like a famous woman or looking like a real woman. But no matter what: get assistance, find a dress you can breathe in and always remember, honey, you’re just a man in a dress unless you’re wearing a wig, lashes and heels (add a size and a half). Good luck! (For some tried-and-true tips, take a gander at my cartoon.)

Dear Trinity,

Is it wrong to be on Grindr and Scruff when my boyfriend’s away? I’m just making friends!

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Yours, App Cheat/Chat, Hollywood, FL

Dear App Cheat/Chat,

If your relationship is going strong or under three years old, then this is a huge danger and extremely unnecessary. If you want to make friends then go to parties, join athletic teams or intellectual groups with your partner or go to religious/spiritual gatherings together. Wake up! Those apps almost always lead to hookups or something your relationship doesn’t deserve. Pumpkin, having and dealing with one three-dimensional boyfriend with healthy needs is so much easier than dealing with an app full of two-dimensional needy sex addicts.

Hey Trinity,

Two days ago, my boyfriend announced that he wants to break up. But we’ve been together almost a year, and I just moved in with him six weeks ago. What do I do now!

Fooled Again, Cleveland, OH

Hey Fooled Again,

I know you want to feel like a fool, but, sweetie, you’re really just in a foolish situation. Living with and breaking up with someone could be devastating unless you read:

Trinity’s Survival Tips For Living With A Lover Who Wants To Break Up

 1.
Don’t make any rash decisions or sign anything for two weeks. It’s impossible to think clearly during the first stage of a breakup.

 2.
Move out of the bedroom to the couch or guest room or have your ex do it. The time to stop yearning for his or her warm body is now!

 3.
Immediately stop sharing food, clothing, meals, showers and intimate moments together.

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 4.
Being mad is normal,
even healthy, so for awhile avoid each other as much as possible, which leads to #5.

 5.
Avoid arguing at all costs. Say as little as possible for now. It’s not about who’s right or wrong; it’s about getting through the next couple of weeks.

 6.
Send your live-in ex away for a few days to a week. According to Delphine Hirsh’s book, “A Girl’s Guide To Surviving A Break Up,“ “When someone you live with wants to break up, send them away for a bit!” Then go to #7.

 7.
Immediately start 1) spending time with people who love you, 2) talking about your feelings and 3) oversleeping. This will help ground you.

 8.
Protect your home
by telling your ex not to bring in any future dates or mates. You may feel like your home is all you have left, so protect it.

 9.
Do all of the above!

10.
Lastly, you may want to 1) move out
(with lots of help from friends), 2) move your ex out (with no help from you) or 3) stay living together (with even more help from God), which means setting up lots of new boundaries! : :

info: With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org. Learn more at telltrinity.com.

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