I’ve been ill for months now. And I’ve been telling my primary doctor that I know what’s wrong with me. But he keeps saying, “the tests don’t prove it.” But I’m sure I know myself. What do I do?
No Relief, Chattanooga, TN
Dear No Relief,
People of authority i.e., ministers, doctors, judges and queens, don’t ALWAYS have the right answers and/or know what they’re talking about. Just look at the COVID-19 press briefings. At first doctors said, “No masks necessary for the public” now they’re say “masks save lives.” Remember the joke, “What’s the difference between God and a doctor? God knows he’s not a doctor.” At some point in life we realize we may know more about ourselves than our doctor. So, honey, get a second opinion until you can get the results you need. Give ‘em hell!
I’ve been with the same person for years. We have a nice life, but our sexual experiences have diminished with time. How can I make our life more sensual, before it ends up senseless?
Yours, Too Practical, Santa Barbara, CA
Hey Too Practical,
Everything, everyone and every relationship eventually needs new chains and chokers… I mean changes and challenges. Like a home needs to be reconstructed every so often, so does a relationship. When I want to make a good relationship even better, I add some adventure into our lives. And sometimes, sweetie, that means giving your nice life a naughty twist! Think sexy. Think naughty. Think outside the box. And think tight uniforms. (Naughty or nice? See my cartoon for a naughty tip!)
After a year of dating the same guy, I’m getting more and more uncomfortable with the fact that he still lives and owns a home with his ex-lover. Am I crazy for being concerned that their friendship could cause future problems in our relationship?
Thanks, Crazy/Concerned, Provincetown, MA
Never avoid your feelings. Feeling concerned about anything is healthy and normal. Yet, it’s not uncommon in gay life that ex-couples stay friends, roommates and even property owners. So, don’t become a rifle-swinging madman over their relationship. For now, accept their strong friendship. However, if they’re also sharing a bed, vacations and leather accessories, then I’d call a mortician… I mean a meeting between you and your date. Pumpkin, there’ll always be problems to deal with and, hopefully, this won’t be one of them!
For the first time in my life someone I once dated is stalking me. It’s now affecting everything I do. I’m even having nightmares! Help!
Stalking Dilemma, Montréal, QC
Dearest Stalking Dilemma,
Being stalked is awful. It has ruined people’s lives. So, darling, it’s time to start practicing:
Trinity’s Strategic Tips For Being Stalked
1. First, be very clear and direct. Be tough, stern and aggressive. Insist that he/she stop stalking you!
2. Continually use the word STALKING whenever you deal with this person!
3. Tell the authorities. Making a report today may save you the burden of proof tomorrow.
4. If you get letters or texts, threaten to publicly print those texts and/or send them to everyone connected to this stalker.
5. Get support from a counselor, a big tough thug, a watchdog and/or a security system!
6. Be strategic and creative! Say things that turn this person OFF to you emotionally and sexually, i.e. my genital herpes are out of control again.
7. Unfortunately, you may have to change your phone number(s) and possibly your address.
8. Call all of his/her friends and family to let them know what is happening. Tell them to do something, or you’ll see them all in court!
9. Maybe go to his/her workplace and publicly make a big scene!
10. Lastly, don’t let yourself get as obsessed as your stalker. Try to conduct your life in as normal a fashion as possible, until it’s over!
With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org, Gay Spirituality for the Next Generation! Learn more at telltrinity.com. Send emails to: firstname.lastname@example.org.