Photo Credit: Francois Olwage via Unsplash

Hey Trinity,
At fourteen I suffered from a colonic disease and had something attached to my side that I was shy about. It’s gone now, but at 30 I’m still a virgin. I recently decided to explore dating ads and websites, but I’m still nervous. So I’ve decided to go to counseling, and was wondering if you think it’s a good idea?
Yours, Thirty And Ready, Oklahoma City, OK

Hey Ready,
Everyone should try counseling at least once in his or her life. With counseling you get support, education, compassion, insight into your fears and you get some great second opinions. Most importantly, counseling teaches socialization skills and techniques you need to bring you up to speed emotionally, physically and sexually. So sweetie, DON’T waste any more time doing it alone, I mean being a virgin alone, I mean, well, you know what I mean.
Kisses, Trin. 

Dear Trinity,
Sometimes life has too many apples to choose from. How do I know if I’m choosing the right or wrong apple? Is there any special secret about good decision-making?
The Good/Bad Apple, Atlanta, GA

Dear Apple,
As with Adam and Eve, you have to decide whether to taste the apple and then how to deal with the outcome of your decisions. Either way you always have to do something so that something happens. Yet for all your decisions, use intuition. And for all the wrong decisions trust that great decisions will come from them. Also remember darling, don’t waste time wasting time in the garden, just LIVE!

Hello Trinity,
I’m in love with my best friend. He also has feelings for me. What should we do about it without potentially ruining our friendship? 
Yours, Friends and Feelings, Panama City, FL

Hello FF,
This dilemma is as common as wanting to touch a stove to see if it’s hot. Some people are willing to get burned, and some are boring, I mean, too afraid or too practical to take risks. I say never be afraid and when all else fails, ditch your fears and follow your intuition. Now, honey pie, if someone doesn’t try something soon no one will even get hot, never mind burned! 
Love, Trinity

Dearest Trinity,
My girlfriend always gets on my case about saying the wrong thing. She says I should’ve just said nothing! How does one know when to say nothing?
Thanks, Tongue Tied, Memphis, TN

Dearest Tied,
In life, there are definitely times to shut up, stay silent and/or simply say, “nothing.” But pumpkin, if you haven’t learned about these special times, how could you know? So here’s:

Trinity’s Unforgettable Tips for When to “Say Nothing” (SN)

  1. When you catch your roommate masturbating in a dark closet, SN.
  2. When your very drunk lover slips you a few hundred bucks cause, “I (burp) luv ya,” SN.
  3. When you and your partner have a big fight and she says, “I need a few minutes,” besides saying, “no problem” also SN.
  4. When the cop says, “If you say another word, you’re under arrest,” SN.
  5. When your best friend’s mother dies and he’s uncontrollably crying in your arms, let him cry, rub his head and SN.
  6. When you’re given free food, admission and/or drinks by the flirtatious host, besides, “thank you,” SN.
  7. When the medical marijuana clinic gives you two edibles for the price of one, SN.
  8. When your very old and very wealthy dying grandmother at the restaurant table begins stuffing her purse with sugar packets, bread, butter and maybe a fork, SN.
  9. When your boyfriend spills his guts about what’s not working in the relationship, let him talk and SN till he’s done.
  10. When the man of your dreams suddenly plasters a wet kiss on your lips then says, “Sorry, I thought you were someone else!” SN.

With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama performed globally, and is now minister of sponsor, WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings, wigministries.org, Gay Spirituality for the Next Generation! Learn more at telltrinity.com.
Send emails to: trinity@telltrinity.com.

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