Hello Trinity,
My lover constantly says, “Communication is everything. If you ‘want’ a relationship you have to ‘want’ to communicate!” Really?
Why Talk, Indianapolis, IN

Hello Why Talk,
How important is communication to a relationship besides a good martini you ask? Well, how disastrous would life be if cellphones stopped phoning, U.N. translators stopped translating or airport communication towers just shut down? Communication really is the foundation to every successful interaction including relationships. So, honey, if you want your relationship to soar, you must learn to love
communication, which includes: accepting the word “no,” compromising your pride and selfishness and agreeing peacefully that you may sometimes disagree. Oh, and respect, without it you’re just another murder trial on Court TV!

Hey Trinity,
I’m in month three with my new boyfriend and it seems like I have to be secretary, cook and chauffeur. I don’t mind, but does dating mean acquiring a set of degrees and licenses too?
Back To School, Boston, MA

Hey BTS,
Yes, dating does require someone to become handyman, housekeeper and honorary judge, never mind psychic and philosopher. Sorry, sweetie, but if cats need nine lives for the perfect life cycle, you may need nine professions for the perfect relationship. (See how this works in my world by catching my cartoon.)

Dearest Trinity,
My girlfriend and I have been dating monogamously for nine months. However, I still fantasize about my ex. Controlling my desires is tough enough, but do I have to control my fantasies too?
Mind Over Matter, Houston, TX

Dearest Mind Over Matters,
Everyone fantasizes, it’s healthy, but you really should be fantasizing about your new mate. So, lets change all that right now with NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming. It works like this: visualize a clear, colorful picture of you having sex with your ex; then make the picture black and white, then blurry, then getting smaller until it disappears. After you do this a few times, simply bring back a picture from small to bigger, blurry to clear and black and white to color of you making love to your new girlfriend. It’s that simple, sweetie! And, if this fails, change

Dear Trinity,
After living in Wilton Manors, (FL) for many years I must ask, why are gay men so readily available for action? Are they always horny and are they all good in bed?
Put The Man In, Wilton Manors, FL

Dear Put It In,
Very often it’s “yes” for both, but one reason may be, gay men often know how to make someone feel “right at home.” That’s why many of them like visiting each other’s homes. And while we’re on the subject, here’s:

Trinity’s Smart Tips For How To Be A Gay Man And A Great Sex Partner
1. Respect: Gay men always turn off all phones and give roommates “the signal” to stay away.
2. Cleanliness: Gay men always promise clean bed sheets, period.
3. Preparation: Before lying down with someone, they always prepare the perfect lighting.
4. External Mood: Gay men always keep the remote control for music and lighting at arms reach for easy adjustment.
5. Internal Mood: Gay men always have a Merlot, Shiraz or Cabernet around to help set the mood.
6. Tools of the Trade: In the second drawer of the nightstand they always keep plenty of hand towels, lube and condoms plus a few surprises.
7. Grooming: Gay men often trim the pubic area and genitals for a youthful glow.
8. Manners: Gay men always try to “finish” at the same time or help the one who didn’t finish first, finish last. No one leaves incomplete.
9. Charm: If one man is “dirty” the phrase, “Lets first take a shower together” always turns disaster into delight.
10. Finale: If man A explodes on man B then man A always gets a warm cloth to wipe off man B. It’s only polite! : :

— With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama, and now performs globally.

info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com
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