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Tell Trinity – Page 28 – QNotes

Sex appeal: Fighting it or finding it within yourself

Tell Trinity

Dearest Trinity, I’m so sick of the “beautiful people” getting all the attention. Don’t you think that all this importance on beauty and sex appeal is making life too competitive? Beauty Queasy, Minneapolis, Minn. Dearest Beauty Queasy, Sorry to burst your competitive bubble but beauty will always be competitive, always be in style and always …

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Is monogamy ruining your relationship?

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Hello Trinity, The life or death act of monogamy seems to be ruining so many couples. Do you really think gay couples can be sexually monogamous for their entire history or do you think monogamy should focus more on the emotional commitment rather than the sexual one? Monoga-Minded, Toledo, Ohio Hello Monoga-Minded, If a gay …

Just because everyone says you’re an addict, are you?

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Dear Trinity, My partner says I’m an addict and need help. If I drink a lot but have a good handle on my life, am I still an addict? Addict With A Handle, Palm Springs, Calif. Dear Addict With A Handle, Most everyone is addicted to something. But as time passes most people can’t recognize …

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How to tell your best friend, “You’re being cheated on?”

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Dear Trinity, Everyone accept my best friend knows he’s being cheated on. Should I tell him or should I let him find out on his own? Either way he’s in for a big hurt! Burning Both Ends, Flint, Mich. Dear Burning, The question is not do you tell him, but rather, “How do you help …

Keeping or losing your job: Is really just about fitting in?

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Dear Trinity, I have a feeling I may lose my job. Any ideas on how to keep a job and/or keep from loosing one? Job Doubts, Charleston, W.Va. Dear Job Doubts, Even though last year you may have won “Employee Of The Year,” this year’s bad economy, loss of profits and/or someone with more tenure …

Learning to control your uncontrollable obsessions

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Dear Trinity, How does one know when they are obsessed versus when they are strongly attached to someone? And, how do you control obsession? Obsessions, Albany, N.Y. Dear Obsessions, Everyone obsesses and I mean everyone! How well you control it versus how much it controls you distinguishes a “crazed” or obsessed desire from a healthy …

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How to break the habit of ‘being shy’

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Dear Trinity, I recently started going out in the gay scene and really enjoy it. My preferred type is TV/TS. But when I see pretty drag queens at the bars, I’m too shy to approach them. What should I do? To Shy Charleston, W.Va. Dear To Shy, Shyness is your mind’s fear of being rejected. …

How wrong are extra-marital affairs?

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Hello Trinity, The extra-marital affair I am having is starting to bring about many more problems than I could have ever imagined. I am not trying to hurt anyone. I am just trying to take care of my needs. What can I do now? Extra Troubles, Buffalo, N.Y. Hello Extra Troubles, Sometimes we find ourselves …

Beating stress, embracing change and finding a higher paying job

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Hey Trinity, I lost my job of five years and I am so upset. I’m worried that I won’t find another one as good. Any words of wisdom? Jobless, San Francisco, Calif Hey Jobless, Typically, people change jobs four times in their life. So, sweetie, fear not but fear itself. When something awful falls into …

Being single: A time to develop yourself?

Dear Trinity, Why are some of us cursed with being forever single while everyone else gets to be in love or married? Doesn’t being single just suck? Help, Forever Single, St. Louis, Mo. Dear Forever Single, If you look real closely at people in love you’ll notice plenty of troubled moments hidden in between public …